Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Im trying...

OK, So I am trying to figure out how to LINK to another blog.. not doing it right, and oddly enough I have to wait to hear from my mom to figure it out. See, it has always been ME helping my MOM with computer stuff.. ha now she gets to help me!! Enlightening!!!! Love you mom!

So, I was speaking with another friend.. and he we were talking about his relationship with his wife. They have a baby, under a year. He was talking about her drive and the lack of it. So, I was helping him with some ideas of what he could do to help out in that area. I think that sometimes media makes people think the wrong things. I do not need jewelry or flowers all the time. Simply I just need to know that you care for me! Yes, in your mind you might think that you are loving me the right way, but it is NOT what I really am needing. To be fair, I may be loving you, but not the way you need. I took a test a week ago, had my friend take it too. It is called "Love Languages". Not that I didn't already realize this.. but it made it more clear. What does someone do that tells me they love me? Well for ME it is more of a do things for me... NOT grand things.. small things. This is called Acts of Service. That was my top, the other four are Words of affirmation.. hey to me words are just words...., Quality time (yes this is good. and I love to spend time with my man.. but what is making me feel loved in this? Receiving gifts, oh of course we all like gifts.. but really a DVD player.. Tinted windows... umm no thanks, yes I like the trinket you bought me.. but did you put time and thought into it, or just run to the nearest jewelry store and "grab and go"? Physical touch.. oh yah anyone who knows me .. knows I MELT with a massage, light touch... no deep tissue here..I really have paid my daughter $5.00 a massage, told her she could make $10 a week.. (and no, she doesn't) Still love you kiddo. Back to the issue at hand though, and keep in mind this is ME, not you or her, or him.. we all feel loved in different ways. So, perhaps I am doing small things for my loved one and it is not making him feel loved. Breakfast made for you, taking out the trash so you don't have to.... in my mind I am doing it all right.

I explained to my friend that sometimes without prompting let your wife now how beautiful she is to you, and mind your wording. We do not want to hear You're hot. How about something with a bit of romance? Honey, you look so beautiful, the way the light is reflecting off of your hair, your skin is so soft, I want to run kisses up and down you. Make it about her! Not you. Men, most of the time us women think it is always about you.. right or wrong.. this is true! Don't have the attitude that I "owe" her.. if you think you owe her, so what..make her feel like you WANT to do it.. and FOLLOW through!
IF you love her isn't she worth it? We all know that women are emotional creatures. SO PUT some EMOTION into it! Really it comes down to learning your partner, hence why they say relationships are WORK, though at the end of the day if it is what and who we want, we work hard for it!

***Please keep in mind that I am speaking in generalities, of course not all women and men are the same. I am not man bashing here either. I also have lots to learn!

3 comments:

  1. Great post. I see a future here! I do not understand why you are having problems linking with other blogs.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Like the look, colors are perfect!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm trying to figure out how to post comments so I can show my mom :( Why is this blog stuff so complicated???

    ReplyDelete